Shortly after the boyfriend and I moved in together, I added a phone for him to my cell phone plan. He protested, saying he wasn't much of a "cell phone guy". Which proved to be true. He rarely carried it and more often then not when I called his number I'd hear the phone ringing down the hall, from the laundry basket. Prudently, we limited him to the most basic of phones, since more than one disappeared, lost under car seats with dead batteries for months on end.
He's gotten better over time, and last year I decided it was time for him to step boldly into the 21st Century with an iPhone. Actually, I decided I deserved the latest iPhone and graciously offered him my old hand-me-down iPhone 2. It was cheaper than buying him a new phone.
He took to it like a duck to water and now my days were filled with funny texts and random photos.
Or at least they were until Tuesday.
Someone stole his iPhone.
He'd left it charging on his desk and someone swiped it when he wasn't looking. The bastards.
Suddenly the man who wasn't a "cell phone guy" was lost. And he felt awful. And he didn't know how he would replace it.
I felt sorry for him and decided I'd take it upon myself to replace it yesterday, even though ATT informed me I'd have to pay full freight for it, the list price of $649.00. It would be an early birthday gift. And Christmas gift.
So I schlepped down to the ATT store yesterday and met with Enrique. Enrique pulled up the account and noted that I had reported the phone stolen, and then a practiced look of surprise and joy spread across his face. It was good news, Enrique said, the phone qualified for an upgrade, yadda, yadda, yadda, loyal customer for so many years, yadda, yadda, yadda, the new phone would be discounted to only $198.00!
As long as I signed a new two year contract.
Sure, whatever. I just saved almost $400.
But Enrique had a solution for that too. They had a special deal on iPads.
Now, I've been a Mac guy for 20 years. I've wanted an iPad from the day they were released, but back in 2010, that was out of the question. We were living in much diminished circumstances and there was absolutely no way to rationalize purchasing one. But still I coveted.
Recently our circumstances have somewhat improved and I had come up with a whole new, reasonably plausible excuse to buy one. I had taken on more classes to teach at the same time my workload with main client had mushroomed. While I was off at various campuses teaching, I was having to be in constant touch with the client, reviewing docs, checking email, carrying on numerous virtual conversations. It's nearly impossible to properly look at intricate docs on my phone and it wasn't practical to haul around my bulky laptop and repeatedly boot it up just to read email. An iPad was the perfect solution.
At least, that's what I told myself.
And yet still, I balked. The past couple of years of poverty had made me gun shy in regards to spending money. Which was a good thing. I just couldn't bring myself to pull the trigger on my own. What I needed was an enabler. What I needed was... Enrique.
He's good, that Enrique. I never knew what hit me.
Even as I brought my new iPad home, I was having enormous pangs of guilt which I tried to muffle with my school/work rationale. And not surprisingly, it worked like a charm. I lovingly removed it from it's box and caressed it's sexy surfaces. I powered it up and quickly linked it to the home Wifi. Then I set up my email and as I cradled it in my lap, marveling at it's beauty, I hit "Get Mail".
The first email from from my school, informing me that due to low enrollment for the summer quarter, all but one of my classes had been cancelled.
Hmmmm.
The smart thing to do, the prudent, wise, mature thing to do, would be to return it. I don't really need it anymore, my whole rationale has been blown all to hell. It's an extravagant expense that can't really be justified. The smart thing to do would be to return it.
Yes, that would be the smart thing to do.
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The boyfriend just emailed me from work to say that, wonder of wonders, his iPhone just showed up.
His old iPhone.
So, he doesn't really need the new iPhone now either.
The smart thing to do, the prudent, wise, mature thing to do, would be to return it. And the iPad. That would be the smart thing to do.
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Turns out, the boyfriend and I aren't as smart as we thought we were.
