Well, we made it through the family Thanksgiving relatively unscathed. A minor miracle, seeing as how the holiday fell so soon after the election.
You see, my sister and brother-in-law are Wingnuts.
That wasn't always the case. They've always been Republican, but they used to be the thoughtful, intelligent sort, the ones formally referred to as Rockefeller Republicans, the liberal on social issues, fiscally conservative kind. Somewhere during the Bush years, probably shortly after 9/11, they took a hard right turn into Crazytown. That's when I remember the Glenn Beck stickers start showing up on their car.
My parents, by contrast, started out as good solid Midwestern Republicans but over time have shifted to being even more liberal than me and the boyfriend. I think it was because of Nixon. I remember a family trip back to the East Coast during the summer of 1973 where my mother insisted we stay at the Watergate hotel and tour all the highlights of the then ongoing Watergate investigation. My folks even bought me a wanted poster featuring photos of all the Nixon staff. Good times. They've been solid Democrats ever since.
But back to Thanksgiving. Family get-togethers had already grown tense, but the election of Obama sent my sister and brother-in-law clear 'round the bend. Innocuous small talk would veer violently into talk of Death Panels and Re-education camps and secret U.N. agendas. My brother-in-law would rail on and on about gun rights and grow enraged when I pointed out the fact he didn't actually own any, you know, guns. An innocent comment about the weather would launch a full scale attack on "so-called" climate change. Each holiday seemed to grow increasing worse and we finally reached our nadir a couple of years ago at an Easter Brunch with my sister chasing after me in the parking lot screaming "Socialist! Socialist! Socialist!"
So, we, banned any mention of politics from that point on.
The question remained whether the truce would hold, what with the re-election of the Kenyan Anti-colonialist Usurper.
And, for the most part, it did.
My sister briefly went off on an anti union tirade, but her heart didn't really seem to be in it and it fizzled pretty quickly. I've never quite understood her beef with the unions, especially considering... she's in one. And not just any union, mind you. She's a member of the much hated Teacher's Union, scourge of Republicans everywhere. Thanks to the union, she makes close to six figures and, with tenure, can never be fired. Without it, she'd be lucky to be making $30K, if she hadn't already been downsized. I guess cognitive dissonance is just one of those things you learn to live with on the Right.
She gained a little more traction with her main bugaboo.... the "War on Christmas".
As a music teacher, she's on the front lines of the heathen assault to strip the CHRIST out of CHRISTmas.
"They insist on calling it a 'Holiday Concert' or a 'Winter Concert', but I just throw it back in their faces.... it's a 'CHRISTMAS Concert'".
She says parents have complained.
"Mostly it's the Asian or Muslim ones."
Gee, couldn't see that coming.
She's most upset with the kids.
"None of them even know the words to most of the Christmas Carols."
And really, why would they, being all Buddhist and Muslim and shit?
Evidently the whole thing recently lead to a confrontation with the principal.
"What is he going to do, fire me? I have tenure." She said, cluelessly.
At that point, I just walked away. I find that works best.
Christmas is at their house this year. Should prove to be a hoot.
